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Thursday, 20 July 2017

The Party Season

What to say..mmmmm , well I picked up some holiday cover , either that or yet another staff member has walked out..lol  this is a big risk , the big risk being will i get paid this month or will the firm go into liquidation again because they cant make the wage bill ?

Despite being cured by the DWP Mr BH hasnt been to well the last couple of weeks , im not so sure that isnt caused by the stress of our current situation , we managed to see a GP the other day , the nice one who always seems to be on maternity leave , she must have a huge family..lol  . So now hes got to await a head CT appointment due to some really odd neurological problems hes having ,  we can add that to his ENT appointment thats been 6 months cancelled 5 times still waiting for his next one . His urgent be seen in 2 weeks bum doctor appointment thats now been cancelled 6 times and been over 6 months.  Orthopedics dont want to see him again , his hip and pelvic injections having been totally ineffective , they have once again come up with theres nothing more they can do . Thats 5 consultants and 3 different hospitals  all say the same , but the DWP know better .

Odd fact , they now ration the heavy duty painkillers he has for when he does something dumb or takes a tumble , bit bazaar as these were what they wanted him to take daily on cost grounds before he insisted on seeing the pain consultant , it has to be really bad for him to take them as they knock him out and turn him into a grinning zombie . But he is allowed 4 a day in short bursts because otherwise we would be cluttering up A&E every time he tumbled . It would seem your only allowed 5 days worth now because people sell them!!   We could be rich and not know it .

Heres a little DWP logic to lighten the situation
Pain does not score any points in an assessment
If you have had a operation since your last assessment you must have been cured (if only)
There are no points for mental illness caused by your physical condition
100m walking in the DWP universe can be measured at 20m with a normal measure , even if you never asked to see the person walk .and only pointed to a chair in the garden  less than 20m away .

So this month we have achieved , all the bills got paid because we sold some stuff , we ate rather well because i grew a lot of veg this year , its my birthday and the kids have bought me fuel !!! so i can do more work i might get paid for and its raining properly at last , so the apples and pears may finally swell ready for the first harvest .

Tuesday, 11 July 2017

Just Knit It

So in the depths of the dry and arid wastelands that are the fen edge what have i been up to?  Truthfully not a lot , work has dried up , we dont do a whole lot during the school holidays , plus theres the small matter of the receivership and the new investors the men in charge are currently threshing out a deal with .  Its surprising how much i can save by not going to work , so we are just managing on the odd car boot and a bit of ebay at the moment , our caseworker has gone off sick so nothing much happening in the world of form filling and scrounging off the state .
Im just building up to restarting the ebay shop during the school holidays and for a change i will run it into xmas  , I decided its better to car boot and have a good clear out through the decent weather , the local car boot is now free , so if i make £20+ a week selling total crap I can live with that and it keeps us in bread milk and fuel .
  Theres a certain snobbery at the car boots , the stall holders are mainly men of a certain age who are as miserable as sin and class a £100 a week as their pocket money . I had a bit of a spat with one next to me the other week .

I wouldnt get out of bed to sell the shit you do .

Really??

Bloody junk that should go in the bin .

I view it as recycling , theres a use for everything .

Your even giving stuff away, whats the bloody point in that .

I was giving away a box of jam jars and a box of eggboxes , I knew someone would have a use for them.  I also give away stuff im sick of the sight of ..lol  the ends of stuff ive had a big pile of , or the cant be bothered to pack it back into the car stuff . The eggboxes got me a dozen lovely eggs from the lady who took them , im more than happy with that .

Its such a spiteful selfish world we live in and its the little things that make me happy . sitting outside at 5am reading , because the hot flushes are back with a vengeance stress methinks .  The orchids growing in the lawn hence the peculiar cutting pattern..lol  , bee watching in the clover beds  etc etc


Meanwhile this bit of tattyness brought a smile to my face , take a close look at the red hat at the back , yep back in the 60s it was acceptable to mount a golliwog on top of you kids head .....how times have changed

Wednesday, 5 July 2017

Bored

Being poor is boring ...that should be the whole of this post ..lol
But its not , today im sat here trying to justify going to a sale for the day just to get a break from Mr Bah Humbug and his endless bad tempered, woe is me attitude .
He has crashed and burned mentally yet again , not a big surprise under the circumstances i must admit , refusing to wash and shave or change his clothes , I know he has mental health problems , but once again hes refusing to see the doctor and hes just so damned nasty to us all including the munchkin that life is now hard work .  I feel as if im the referee in a rather sarcastic boxing match , nothing is right for him.

The dreaded interview with housing benefit went rather strangely , told them the circumstances and there was an awful lot of tooth sucking , it seems once again im technically guilty of fraud , because he has been in receipt of ESA since March and i havent informed them , but they hadnt  informed us till a week ago either !!  He receives no money he hasnt for over 2 years now so how would we know . It seems the information was never sent to them either , so they hadnt recalculated anything , so they have to recalculate from march ....err but we havent received anything so the calculation should be the same ...much tooth sucking again.

So once again  i was issued the eviction speech  , so i just pointed out that my partner is disabled and this is a disabled adapted property and that we do have a caseworker . More tooth sucking
I finally left with a form for discretionary Housing Benefit which i will give to our caseworker to try and sort out and a lecture on how i need to work more hours ...so a result methinks !!

Try not to laugh at this , received a phone call from the boss , it seems that they have been in receivership for a week because they couldnt make the wage bill this month , had i not noticed a different name on my pay slip?   Not really as i hadnt had a damned wage slip and they now owe me a considerable sum of money , peanuts to them but not to me .
I wish they had gone to the wall then we could get some financial help !!

Monday, 3 July 2017

My Way

We ive cleared loads of crap by doing a couple of car boot sales , still lots more to go as i havent even tackled the sheds yet...lol
Sarcastic son has been a big help and daughter is starting to sort me tons of stuff out , just donated a pile of university text books that will go on to ebay once the kids get there results , law and politics are good sellers , so thats a couple more weeks of bills paid .
I have to sort out another bank account because theyve shut my personal account ,i havent had a wage from the business in months , im once again credit blacklisted ( cant eat your credit rating so not that bothered ) Creditors wise some have been lovely , Anglian Water however are their usual twatish selves we had to go to the regulators last time we had financial problems !!
Found out that most banks wont accept me because I dont have a UK Passport , so will try to get round the Coop as they have social exclusion policies that arent affected by a bad credit rating .

British Gas rang to drop a bombshell, we will no longer be able to use home vending on our  prepayment meter from later in the month , we must accept a smart meter , yes great, but they dont work here, we have no mobile signal of the correct type , plus if you take a British Gas meter thay are different to other suppliers and then you cant change supplier!! British Gas are currently the cheapest prepayment suppliers in this area , but we have no shop to vend a key the nearest post office is a village away but it hardly opens anymore and we dont have enough regular income  to put a weeks worth of electric on at a time !! we use the odd £10 in Paypal to top up normally.

Wish me luck im off to North Kesteven Council to try and sort out the Housing Benefit , last time they just started eviction proceedings at that point and accused me of Benefit Fraud !!!  Ho hum out of everything theyre the one that makes me lose the will to live , they have nice staff and a few absolute swines who just think your off the programmes on the telly .

Tuesday, 27 June 2017

What Fun

So to celebrate destitution I buggered off on a trip to London , my birthday trip from my daughter so all paid for and done in advance . We took the Munchkin on his first trip to a gig rather than a big concert . Alan Doyle and the Beautiful Gypsies.  At the Bush Hall in Shepherds Bush , lovely venue fantastic staff only the size of a large pub , former music hall and bingo hall and you could take kids!!! We were sheltering from the sun round the side of the venue and the munchkin chimes up
Hello Alan !! sign my Ipod case for me
Next thing i know hes been kidnapped by a dodgy Canadian bloke and vanished into the venue to meet the band ..lol
He reappeared well pleased and laden with freebies , what can i say theyre a band of real nice folks . We were right at the front and they stopped for a natter with the munchkin half way through the gig ..lol..hes never stopped singing since we got back

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nGPgcZ3CWI


On the destitution front ....you all worry to much , we are fine for a couple of months at least , its going to be grim but its been grim in the past and weve managed .
For those from abroad , let me explain . Because i am self employed i receive nothing from the state if sick or out of work for 6 months . it makes no difference if we split up , I would still receive nothing. Mr Bah Humbug would receive something if i left him , not much and it would be eaten up by carers fees , he still wouldnt be given anything to live on until his appeal is heard and their are layers to the appeals which the government is spending on lawyers to fight the appeals thats why it takes so long . Many of the appeals are queuing for the High Courts that can take up to 2 years , they hope you die during this time !!
A benefits queen "friend" of the type you see on the TV , never worked , different ailment everytime they threaten her with work, all the kids statemented with different problems did give me some advice.
I should dump Mr BH  in the Local Jobcenter and scream the place down about how hes incontinent and let him crap all over the floor , thats what she would do !!  They soon cough up then ...REALLY!!
In the world where i live you just plant another 20 cabbage plants , and dig out the bed pads you made before we got the damned PIP payments in the first place and just get on with it......

Thanks for all your kind words , we have internet for another 2 months  , so i will keep you posted





Friday, 23 June 2017

Celebrate The Apocalypse

Quite where to begin , a few weeks ago Mr Bah Humbug  had a PIP reassessment , both myself and his caseworker were present and he sobbed through most of it due to the embarrassing nature of the questions . He had a further year to run but they decided to visit him early .
Last week we received a letter to say he scored nil points , he has been cured by the DWP , he has no visable signs of disability and because he can drive a manual vehicle no mobility needs, we were expecting the rate for mobility to drop because they have removed the mental health descriptors from the questions because to many people were getting it !!
But to lose all of it is bizarre , he has a degenerative condition , its not getting better , he can drive a few miles at most and thats because most of his disability is in his right hand side . when he arrives he has to sit for at least 30 minutes and wait for the feeling to come back to his legs before hes able to walk !!
Then the next day he gets another letter saying he has been awarded full ESA  but because he hasnt paid contributions for 2 years they wont be paying him a penny . He didnt apply for this, he applied for the work with support component this allows him to continue with his 4 hours a week at college.
So our caseworker has started an appeal for both benefits , it is disheartening to find that this can take up to 2 years .
So thats it we have only my unreliable minute income to live on , this is going to effect our Housing Benefit so we may well end up homeless or having to move because this is a disabled adapted property and officially Mr Bah Humbug is no longer disabled . Caseworker says she will start that argument next week once the appeals are lodged .
To say Mr Bah Humbug is down is an understatement , hes doing his best to be vile to all of us in the hope we go off to a "better" life , not happening im afraid , but its true he would be financially better off without us , even though hes cured they would have to provide care workers each morning to get him up washed and dressed , do all his cooking , washing  etc etc .
The main stumbling block is the fact that we are a universal credit area , so i cant apply for tax credits , I cant apply for anything because im self employed , i cant do a damn thing about any of this , just hope they actually pay me this month !!

Friday, 16 June 2017

Kitty Porn


 Penny is now an official Gnome killer !!!  just as photogenic as always , shes truly gorgeous but never stops , with her been so dark its been suggested she wears a hi viz , like to see Mr Bah Humbug achieve that one !!


Tuesday, 13 June 2017

Speechless


A Young Baldrick tale that really beggers belief!!!

Mr Bah Humbug receives a phone call from a housing officer it got a wee bit tense , so he once again throws the phone at me and says sought that !!!
Now once again Young Baldrick has cut us off , hes been ignoring arranged meetings not answering his phone or door etc etc .
It seems hes been refusing to engage at all with any of the agencies hes involved him and his housing officer has had numerous complaints from another resident , so she needed to serve him with notice of eviction!!!
Did we have access to his flat ?
Well we do have a set of keys but he does leave the keys in the door to stop anyone getting in . So we popped down there and i broke in ...oops used the keys...honest .
He was laid stinking, wrapped in his curtains on the sofa  at 2 oclock in the afternoon !!!
The place was a stinking mess , i dont think hed thrown out anything since he moved in , fag ends everywhere , empty bottles everywhere, rotting food wrappers and ball bearings everywhere..WTF !!!
So surprise Step mommy is stood at the side of your sofa screaming in your lug to get your lazy arse up !!
So heres what we found , the little treasure had ordered a replica gun from Amazon which fires ball bearings and peppered the walls with it , thousands of metal ball bearings , it looks like measles in the plaster work!!  He has been using it in the garden so its a wonder he hasnt had a visit from The Men In Black to place a red dot on his forehead!! .....confiscated and destroyed by his dad
The mushrooms that were crawling in maggots had walked into his slow cooker the day before and that was his food for the week , hed gone and bought 30 jars of spices but no other actual food !!
Hes stopped taking his medication ...surprise
So I had a long chat with his housing Officer and it seems she was unaware that he has mental health problems the agency that is supposed to be supporting him never mentioned it .  Why isnt he living with us ?
Because we wouldnt be able to keep our tenancy if he lived with us !!!!! we are overcrowded and hes a nightmare .
 So where do we go from here ?
Well hes back in touch with his support agency . His paperwork is up to date . Hes currently starving and without electricity (at least that should stop the noise complaints )  he can always spend the next week hungry and cleaning , that was the excuse for the state of the place , he had nothing to clean with , so i popped to the shop and bought cleaning equipment ,  can he come here to stop as he doesnt get paid for another week ...Nope

Wednesday, 7 June 2017

Election Eve Broadcast

So here we are nearly at the finishing post ...
And all I can think to say is what a shower of shit are asking for our votes
 Mr Corbyn is a decent honest bloke from a different universe , if he wins we are condemning him to the most poisonous job ever , trying to sort out Brexit . there has been lots of truly evil press and TV against him , but he seems to have enjoyed the whole campaigning experience . Hes doesnt seem to be phased by any of it . now there attacking Diane Abbot endlessly because shes not such a polished professional as some of the others .
Mrs May , well youve had seven years to make any impact on the whole terrorism scenario but seem to be more pleased that youve saved a bit of cash on policing . Sorry love but we have a whole generation of mainly young men in this country who your policies increasingly marginalise , they have no jobs no purpose no future and a few  muslim ones think they have found a purpose in terrorism .
So im going to ask some pretty callous question here .

 Does the money thats been saved outweigh the loss and ruining of lives you have caused ?

The magic money tree that means you cant give anyone in the NHS a proper pay rise have a different branch for funding Trident missiles ?

I travel all over the county of Lincolnshire and the sea of blue placards in pensioners gardens would imply that theyre all going to be voting Tory ,like turkeys voting for Xmas , theres not a thing I can change about that fact.

The one thing ive gathered from this whole campaign is that the press and TV are disgusting and biased, its pretty obvious to anyone , I dont think for one minute Mr Corbyn is an IRA sympathizer but equally i cant believe the disgusting articles stating that Mrs Mays father was involved in one of the churches pedophile scandals .

So vote for whoever you choose thats my verdict , I dont mind who it is . But please vote , express an opinion do something thats all i ask


Monday, 5 June 2017

Bloody Monday

Its 10.30 and its already one of those days !!!! Friday I was summoned into the bank , my only small reliable monthly payment hadnt gone into the bank . I ring my employers , who were very shifty and they  told me they had sorted it , there was a computer problem it would be in by 3pm .
Then this morning i find my phone has been cut off and my car insurance cancelled ...ffs like i need this hassle at the moment , still trying to sort this mess out , not helped by my other half giving me the death stare and refusing to lend me his phone ...grrrr
So I have to prioritize this unholy shitting mess once again caused by my poxy employers , im trying to take on other work ...lot of good with no phone access and not being able to drive.
 Though one company did make me snigger last week they wanted me to work for them because i have tons of experiance , then they asked my age and the whole tone of the interview changed , he finally said that that i didnt fit the demographic they employ , in other words i dont have a penis and im the wrong age ......
My sole plus point in life is little Penny , the least photographic kitten in the litter , Penny because shes a Soft Kitty and my other half loves Big Bang Theory .  Small , very feisty and mental in the way that kittens are really good at . Mr BH went and picked her and made a grave error of judgement in that you cant see a black tabby against a dark carpet , so hes constantly tripping over her and treading on her , her revenge was to wee in his sun hat.....crap photos im afraid shes never still long enough to get a decent picture  once she gets her proper eye colour her looks will improve, for now shes just a weedy little scrap




Monday, 29 May 2017

Wednesday, 24 May 2017

General Election Broadcast No 4

Last week I was listening to a group of Police Officers gossiping , they were laughing at the fact that they are going to magic up an extra 10 000 police , cant even remember which party came up with this one . As one of them pointed out " They cant even recruit enough to keep the numbers up now , the pensions are shocking , the job stinks and everybody with any sense is leaving .
Then theres my mother ...AAARRRGGGHHH ...I already know shes a genetic Tory voter , if they said they were going to gas all benefit claimants and throw all the immigrants off the White Cliffs of Dover, they still wouldnt be hardcore enough for her . 83 and hates everyone..lol

You know that scruffy little shite Corbyn .

Mother!!

He used to be in the IRA

No he didnt mother

I bet he supports the Muslims

Hes a pacifist mother , he supports everyone .

As you may have guessed , she was trying to get me to hang up and i wasnt taking the bait ..lol

Its all the scroungers dragging this country down , the bad back brigade they all want putting down , they should sterilize all the unemployed , just breeding more scroungers etc etc etc on and on and on .

So I just pointed out that ,once Mrs May had forced her to get an equity loan on her home and robbed her of everything but 100k  , she would still be in a care home ...its been very quiet since



Saturday, 20 May 2017

A Week of Ordinary

What can I say , to much work none of it very profitable , my continuing problems with ebay ?
Nope its 3 jumble sale Saturday not quite shore how i will achieve this bountiful feast but im going to try..lol
12.00 Cherry Willingham village hall
1.00  Dunholme Village Hall
1.30 Minting Village Hall

plus a table top sale at Metheringham 9am  that i should be rushing to , but ive just got out of the shower and im not moving fast this morning..lol
Plus theres a Cream Tea and table Top in Timberland Village Hall  thats hardly been advertised at 2.00 that sounds good to me on the way home if i havent spent up

So this is the quick guide to what you do in rural lincolnshire on a Saturday , really i should be stuck at home doing endless chores for this thankless bunch...sod um!!!!!


Saturday, 13 May 2017

General Election Broadcast No 3

Did you witness the appearance of Mr and Mrs May on the One Show ?  all very strange but her and her OH seem to still like each other after a lot of years . I can never fault her taste in shoes ( see I said something positive)  sadly I can never forget the designer leather trousers made from the skins of  Sanctioned Benefit Claimants she wore a few months ago .
Then there was the time she lost a few votes this week  by mentioning that she thought fox hunting was a good idea , see they let her off script for a minute and her campaign managers are crying in the corner...lol
Meanwhile young Jeremy Corbyn seems to be quite enjoying himself tootling round the country , kissing dodgy babies and shaking the hands of all and sundry . Bless him he achieved the status of demigod when he managed to run over a BBC reporters toe from the passenger seat of a car driven by police protection . I really like the bloke but i can see his faults and it does seem his campaign is being managed by Simon Cowell its a wee bit One Direction .
Our local candidate has once again stunned us , someone did point out they thought they were hallucinating walking round Sleaford  this week , its Shetland ponies up and down the High Street in Vote Conservative banners .
So heres my overview.

 Are the Conservatives not taking this Election at all seriously , do they really think they cant possibly lose?
If they do lose , are they counting on the incoming boundry changes to finish the Labour
Party
The CPS have decided that they cant possibly prosecute anyone for electoral fraud . Bleedin Scary, has it been pointed out that the CPS will cease to exist if they do?

Just remember one party politics is what runs North Korea and Syria , thats the really scary thought !!

Thursday, 11 May 2017

Pyrex

When did ebay become so damned complicated?  really struggling with it at the moment not running the shop just using it to sell a few bits and bobs that we dont need , it just seems to be designed to run on a smart phone . Something i dont have and try to avoid at all costs , in fact mobile phones are the one aspect of modern life i detest , I could live without one if it wasnt for work .  Then my wretched phone decided to ring 999 under its own steam this morning 3 times in a row .Why just Why!!!
Got a long lecture about wasting their  time , i heard it talking to itself or i would never have known , apparently EE are experiencing network problems . So ive turned it off and chucked it into a drawer till i need it .
The only pleasure is veg gardening down in the windswept wilderness , bleedin mice have nobbled my sweetcorn it had nicely got shooting up , the potatoes are just up , lots of orkney blue again this year, its a short season potato so the cabbages will go in straight after theyre done , couldnt find my favourite pink fir apples this year , unless i ordered them which i couldnt afford . Theyre may be a few strays pop up, im hoping . Somewhat surprisingly im getting a bit of help from my son , im not complaining , digging reduces me to agony .
The greenhouse is likely never to get finished , mainly because Mr BH is an annoying perfectionist , if hed just vanish for a couple of days it would be up and working , I dont need perfect i just want it up .
Must get round to sorting the strawberry netting , the thrush will be so frustrated but i want to leave them to polinate for a couple of weeks first , then theres the cabbage nets to sort out , the joys of living in the countryside , the wildlife wants to share all your food !!
Mr Bah Humbug went to see some kittens yesterday they will be ready in a couple of weeks, I knew he would give in eventually,  a small furbaby would cheer everyone up , he wants two but we can barely afford one , we arent on Income Support so dont qualify for help with the cost of neutering .
On the Thrift side I managed to get to a Car Boot at New York on Sunday , no its not a large place its a crossroads with a barren windy field with added bucket bog , tons of stalls lots of great stuff and i bought a tray of cauliflowers and calabrese,  they are much further on than mine so it gives the crops a head start a whole £2.00 spent .
I'm going to try and flog these JAJ pyrex lovelies on facebook , my favourite pattern but they would be just stuffed in a cupboard unused so they need to go . If they dont sell I will hide them somewhere ..lol  you can have to many mixing bowls !!



Thursday, 4 May 2017

General Election Broadcast No2

 Caroline Elizabeth Johnson – The Conservative Party candidate for Sleaford and Hykeham ...pair of supporters  seen riding round Sleaford town center in a couple of Sinclair C5s Tuesday ...Why just Why ? Nothing better to spend funds on ? After all Attila the Hun could sit as a candidate for the conservative party here and get elected , we are an area of nothing but pensioners and most of them arent poor . The poor and the disabled are mostly shunted out to the villages to poor quality council accommodation so its easy to believe everythings just fine here. Sadly my vote is worthless here , the blue rinses and the farming community will vote Tory forever . 
So I will leave you with this doodle that came to mind the other day , I think it sums it up , with apologies to Pastor Niemoller 

Monday, 1 May 2017

Bank Holiday

Well this has been exciting , do you ever get one of those days when you want to slaughter the rest of the world ? Once upon a time I had my hormones to blame now theyve dried up I think its just me ..lol
The plan was to get up and do ebay all day , ive mountains of stock kicking around in here and id quite like to see the floor . But nothing is that easy these days we seem to have a charger  thief in this house not sure who but i will hunt them down and kill them , took hours to get a wire to charge the camera .
Then theres the fact that my little finger is off on a mission of its own and its constantly catching the caps lock , it does this from time to time just to annoy me , ive tried taping it down but then my hand twists so i cant type properly , I look like a Victorian Dowager waiting for her cuppa tea .
Mr Bah Humbug is driving me mad as well , everytime i start anything theres a compelling reason he needs me, plus hes on a ,everything i say is wrong mission and hes feeling the urge to constantly correct me ,I know hes in pain but hes behaving like a total twat and now hes finally nodded off on the sofa I thought i will sit down and do a load of ebay listings. in fact ive managed to list 3 lots of wool because ebay doesnt like my photos or the brands or the bleedin EAN no , still clueless what that actually is but someone on the ebay forum said to just type in, does not apply , it worked!!
On the plus side ive managed a cat jumble sale on Saturday up the Birchwood , got all the curtains for Young Baldricks flat for a whole £3 then found out the price of curtain track is bleedin scary, so playing hunt the cheap curtain track at the moment . Moving day is Tuesday for him , still hasnt got a bed but hes got a sofa and a duvet so he will have to manage and hes also got a lot of noodles till his cheap cooker arrives .
The jumble sale also yielded next winters wardrobe for me , love it when unseasonal shopping is so cheap , got this little gem as well , Peace plate from 1918 complete with HMS iron duke and a bit of retro Wedgewood . Sneaked out to the car boot yesterday and all i came back with was a big xmas cactus and a couple of Lavender plants , lots of snide remarks about can we eat them !!



Wednesday, 26 April 2017

General Election Broadcast No 1

You just knew I wouldnt be able to resist didnt you ? I know its weeks away but i think its time to throw a few questions out dont you ? So lets begin with the big one .
Why has Mrs May called a General Election ?
Could it be
A The stress may kill Jeremy Corbyn
B Brexit the shitstorm
C The CPS not doing as their told and ignoring the small amount of election fraud in the last election.

Wellllllll    methinks its got more to do with trying to sort out the killing of the Labour  Party than anything , things have  quietened down around Jeremy these days , hes still alive his tofu burgers and sandals have survived the onslaught of the suits . Hes his usual frail shabby little self and he still quietly puts his case with no dramatics . Hes right about a lot of things and wrong about a lot of things but at least he doesnt think the poor should be paying the price for Brexit and everything else that is wrong in this country .

Do we care about electoral fraud ? We sort of expect it , so the daft gits once again tried to fiddle the expenses , this is a national pastime and let him who is without sin cast the first stone . Are we really that daft our votes can be bought by whoever has more suits on the ground and a shinier bus ?

Wee Jimmy Sturgeon , shes like a small annoying wasp these days and has watched Braveheart once too often but im sure it will be fun if someone has to form a coalition government with her . Then the Scots can have an annual vote on whether to stay or go , not that you can go far on a small island , plus think of the economic boost created by rebuilding Hadrians Wall .

Brexit ho hum , well once the French election finishes we may not be the only country telling the EU where to go , negotiating isnt going to work, so wouldnt 10 blokes with axes in a locked room be a better way of  doing it ?

But the highlight of the whole affair has to be Tony Blair telling everyone to Vote Tory , laughed my socks off at that one .


Saturday, 22 April 2017

The Change of Life

I had one of those conversations yesterday , in Little Tesco while staring at the uninspiring choice in the markdown bin ..lol
There was a gentleman probably in his late 50s with his little wire basket politely waiting like myself for the trolly bashers climbing over each other .
We looked at each others baskets , mine consisted of everyday value pot noodles and everyday value fish fingers , which for 65p for 10 are suprisingly nice if a bit skinny .
He had everyday cat stars and milk . He said
Did we ever think everyday would come to this?
Then he rifled through the markdowns sighing , we both settled for reduced sausages 65p a pack , tesco cheap Richmond copies but I can chop them and add rice, tomato, spices that are kicking about and with a pack of wraps its tea for 4 adults and a child .
This got me thinking , our food budget hasnt increased in years it cant , but things are getting very desperate , MrBh is having his PIP reassessed that is our only reliable income , it will drop by half because the goalposts have changed again and we will then have endless appeals , without any income in that time and with no help from our GP , this takes at least 6 months , hes his usual blase self about it . Im just frantically gardening , the big problem is now he has this diet plan hes supposed to stick to , his food costs twice as much , im losing weight again and munching iron and multivitamins everyday because i have a huge supply discarded by my health nut daughter , fruit is now off the menu he has to have it each day and hes so damned picky its making life hard . Once the garden kicks in things will be much better , but they dont call this time of year The Hunger Gap for nothing .
The GP suggested Weight Watchers for us both , we can both go it seems free,  he needs to lose 10st which would make him the size of an adolescent or a lollipop head , i did laugh according to her chart i should weigh 7st 6 ...in her dreams i think , but if things dont improve she may get her wish, without Weightwatchers.

Wednesday, 19 April 2017

Petty Annoyances

Thankyou all for the sympathy and condolences on the death of the Ginger One , still sadly missed by all . People keep asking me where he is , he was locally infamous as a cat flapper and food stealer and for walking to school howling .
Are we getting another cat , the verdict is mmmmm , both me and the munchkin are lost without him, but a house cat wouldnt work with the kids always running in and out , Ive looked at rescue cats , simply cant afford one im afraid , plus we cant meet the criteria for them   , its made me realise why some rescues are flooded out with animals . theres a big difference between the mythical perfect happy ever after home and the reality of cats . They will live where they choose and do as they want i'm afraid .  We shall see , maybe something furry will come our way ?
I managed a Jumble Sale cum Summer Fayre at the Birchwood this week courtesy of my daughter and spent a whole 80p on tablecloths and £1 on a set of huge curtains for Young Baldrick , he stopped here for Easter Sunday and helped his dad with stage one of finishing the greenhouse construction started 4 years ago ..lol its going to be a long job as i now need decent fence treatment which is costly



. Then theres reopening the ebay shop , that is taking far longer than planned due to endless software and compatibility issues , even the pictures arent working , im sure i will figure it out or my IT expert will ..lol
Thanks to the election work is on hold as usual , im waiting to see if my cheque lands with interest , if it doesnt i think i will retire ...I wish

Wednesday, 12 April 2017

A Week of Negative

Thought our good luck wouldnt last for long . Sadly we lost our Ginger furbaby to a car on Saturday , 9 years of furry pleasure gone in a second , hes been such a big part of everybodys life for so long now , the munchkin is sure he is going to rise on Easter Sunday . Mr says thats it no more , the garden is a furry abbatoir we have buried 4 in 10 years , we live on a quiet country lane but cats have no road sense . I just cant stand the silence , he was very in your face . I cant stand not having a single cuddle from anyone , in fact its driving me mad .
Then I got the stomach bug from hell , so now im wandering round like a drained corpse from hell , tons of work I just cant do, and a Bank Holiday coming up, with no funds and a house move for Young Baldrick who has been given a council flat , with a £150 grant to furnish it , a challenge im not feeling upto..lol  the whole family is giving bits and bobs but will he care ? well hes taking his medication regularly so he seems much more with it , the big question is whether he will keep taking it once hes loose in the community. He will continue to get a bit of support with maintaining his tenancy , but its whether he can manage to keep away from the drugs once hes on is own , or if he is going to get back in with the same crowd as last time only time will tell

Friday, 7 April 2017

A Week of Positive

Things just keep getting better and better , well in my little world they do . This week we had been stalking a new washer in the Argos sale only to find the sale had ended and it had gone up £50 in a day!  So we looked on the comparison websites and found that although the prices were lower in some places once you added the "installation"  delivery and removing the old machine they all came to the same price , the point is we didnt need installation,  delivery or removal but you cant not have them . we stripped the old washer down took out the drum to use in the garden , recycled some of the parts smashed up the plastics and popped them in the bin , kept the door and we were just left with the shell for the travelling wombles to take when theyre about . How they have the cheek to charge for installation i dont know a chimp can do it , but one i emailed stated they just abandon it on your doorstop if you dont pay for installation , plus you cant just collect a washer from a shop these days ..
Anyway i told Mr Bah Humbug that enough was enough and i was off down to Terrys Auction Room to get a washer whether he liked it or not . So for the stunning total of £30 i have a washer , far from new but it works a treat and if i get a year out of it I will be well happy. I will keep my eyes peeled for a newer bigger one when im flush . I ended up staying at the auction all afternoon just for a bit of me time and as usual as the afternoon wore on  the crowd and the internet died a death , they had five flatscreen TVs from house clearances and they were going cheap so with the rest of the washer budget i bought a TV for the bedroom nobody wanted it because it was so thick with dust and weve been without one for nearly a year since one of the kids cast offs died , cant say ive missed it at all but his lordship likes TV when he cant sleep . Got it home dusted it and Mr Bah Humbug started moaning it was to big for the bedroom because its the same size as the one in the living room , he says This is weird theres an awful lot of stuff on this control and its got tons of different sockets on the back ,
 He went on the internet got the manual and then said

How does this always  happen to you ?

What

Youve gone and bought a posh make smart TV with onboard everything.  how much ?

£22 with free dust !!

He was speechless , doesnt happen often .

Monday, 3 April 2017

Just Because

At last a couple of tiny pluses in my lackluster world.  You know the like comment and share competitions on Facebook , well I got this little beauty sent to me by The Search Press to review and im glad to report that this is a  modern crochet book I actually got on quite well with , it does written and charts plus a gorgeous photo and after a play with a few wool scraps , not the right weight or type , I managed to make a flower square that sort of resembled what they thought it should look like , I love crochet for its mindless quality and the fact that if you drop a stitch you wont get miles and hours along before it becomes very obvious . So I plan to have a few more plays with the designs in this one .




I toddled to Methringham car boot yesterday on the way to the Coop , i managed to get my shopping and a big file of knitting patterns with change from £3 , the tatty gem among the mostly 70s and 80s patterns is this War Knitting by Bestway  you can knit an ARP jumper !!





The Coop was having a bit of a clear out on the veg front yesterday so its wilty veg witth everything for the next couple of days , then a root in the freezer to see if theres any fruit left at the bottom to disguise the rhubarb because ive run out of jam and its munchkins holiday club this week ..lol Note to oneself,  must also bake buns he was moaning there were none today











Monday, 27 March 2017

Spring Sprung

So the reason for not being around much is Spring , cant beat a bit of heavy duty garden work in the sunshine , the trouble is im very much Billy No Mates when it comes to the gardening , plus they dont get no dig methods , i have to use those, my cyst ridden hips and back  wont handle a lot of digging . Its been that bad ive had to have a  nettle cull with real weed killer , hideously expensive vile stuff . I always leave a nettle patch between us and the cows it really does seem to keep them from deciding to visit plus the wildlife love them ,but theyre very invasive so needed culling every 3 or 4 years . its not where we plant crops  Ive a mountain of brambles to burn as well .
Im probably wasting my breath , but i want the greenhouse putting up , its been waiting 4 years now and the frames done and im sick of the feeble excuses from the whole lot of them , if they cant be arsed it can be sold , just very militant and totally fed up at the moment.
Still having to handwash everything due to the lack of a washer , this  is eating so much time , once again no help forthcoming .
Yesterday was Mothers Day , so I cooked endlessly for the whole ungrateful bunch of them Young Baldrick included , didnt do an ounce of washing so theyre all whining this morning ,  daughter nipped me to B&Q to price up the stuff for the greenhouse base , then a trip to Poundworld for a pack of Frys chocolate creams .
Dont have the money to pay for the greenhouse base so ive been out first thing skip stalking in Woodhall Spa where the posh folk live , its amazing what they chuck out over the weekend..lol but there were no breeze blocks aaarrrggghhh
Then theres a letter from the council informing us that theyre going to come and see how they can upgrade the heating, i should imagine that will be a log burner which will be no use to Mr Bah Humbug and as he pointed out maybe if they actually fitted double glazing we wouldnt be wasting our time trying to heat this dump , that may sound ungrateful but its ridiculous that they were defrauded by the company that fitted the new windows and it took them 5 years to admit it we have to wait another 25 years before we are allowed new windows again ...aaarrggghh
Work is pathetic , we have none of the work that actually pays till May , so we are more than skint at the moment , still waiting for the wages im owed to catch up , no wage slip yet again which doesnt look promising .

Tuesday, 21 March 2017

And the Winner Is

Amanda ...please email me your address and i will stick an autistic teenager on a bike with the plates ...kidding
Meanwhile in the real world , weve being doing endless Mr Bah Humbug trips and now Ive more Baldrick trips in this weeks workload , they moved him back to his old assisted living project and because most of the residents have been sent to jail he quite likes it there , well thats what theyve told him,  personally I think the staff may have held a cull . Hes got a work placement doing land clearance which he loves and hes still taking his medication and seems fairly lucid . So slightly less worried about him at the moment .
Mr Bah Humbug however is driving me mad after his cured by GP glancing at scan appointment , though he cheered up a bit today, he had his urgent Podiatry appointment and they told him that his galloping diabetes and imminent amputation is actually an ingrowing toenail and his blood sugar is fine . Theyre off to do that for him in the next few weeks , but once again they asked if he has Parkinsons , he was having a bad tremor day today and doing his drunken sailor walk . His comment?

Its all in my head ask my GP

Someone paid me a tiny payment into the bank so I can work the rest of the week ....WHOOPIE
I squandered most of it on a bit of shopping
1 mothers day card
2 packs of pork scratchings
Huge cabbage, cauliflower leeks and grapes off the market , a whopping £2.20
Broad Bean & Sweetcorn seeds Wilcos £2.50
A small bag of compost £2 because I enjoy walking miles back to the car with it , theres nowhere to park due to the poxy transport hub eyesore theyre building in Lincoln .
Then Morrisons for 4 pork chops for tea £5 thats the reason we dont often get decent meat, first time in a year we have had pork chops.
Liver
Cooking Bacon
Cat food
Giant hotdogs
Bread

Ive come to the conclusion I'm just seriously mean not just frugal , Ive been whinging that the prices at the cat jumble sale now being 30p an item , i got a tee shirt for son some xmas fabric and another piece for quilting , plus a typewriter for a £1 . Then yesterday I went off on one because i'd 7 adults for tea and the munchkin and had to use my imagination and root to the very back of the cupboad , it ended up as slow cooker chicken f*%k knows stew.
One lonely chicken breast shredded
One big tin of seriously out of date flagelot beans
3 sticks of wilty celery
2 mangy carrots
handful of lentils handful of dried onions
stock cube
half a tin of tomato paste lurking at the back of the fridge
3 cloves of garlic
two big spoonfuls of chilli sauce
sprinkle of everyday value herbs
add dumplings at the end

Beggers belief but they all went back for seconds , why are the good stews and casseroles always the stuff you just throw in?

Saturday, 18 March 2017

Can You Buy Positivity ?

Havent posted for a few days due to blogger failing to load the write a post page , bless it .
Work dried up this week as it does this time of year before next years contracts start . Then Thursday everything becomes urgent and I havent a cent to my name for fuel . lol such is life
The weather has been glorious and Spring like , so ive had 2 garden bonfires , cleaned up loads outside and theres still tons to do . Charlie Chainsaw has been at it again and has removed more of our fencing to put on his woodburner , most of the trees have gone off the estate now and the new folks over the road are just as bad , he asked the other day if we needed the trees in the garden as we dont have a woodburner , im begining to think they issue them a chainsaw with there tenancy agreement , they dont seem to grasp that you have to dry logs before using them and we have stinky black clouds of smoke when they start them each morning , so my revenge was two bonfires when they put there washing out . I really am that petty lol .
We are now the only council property here that doesnt have a woodburner . But apparently there painting the house this year , not sure when , im hoping they actually replace the front door this time , the bottom is so rotten the mice dont even knock as they run in and out and its horrible getting up to a hall full of snails and slugs when its wet .
Then the washer finally died spectacularly and terminally , the boys dismantled it and some of the parts will be sold on ebay to start the new washer fund , just havent got a penny at the moment , daughter helpfully suggested getting a club book , no thanks . im currently handwashing all the clothes and will stockpile towels and bedding for a launderette trip at the end of the month . Daughter thinks this is unhygienic and is paying her mate to do her and the munchkins washing , tell me the logic of that one ?
We have had problems at the GPs again , we wont even go there, it was so demoralizing and has set mr Bah Humbug off on yet another downwood spiral , it seems they know far more than two consultants he has seen and are experts at looking at scans, who knew ?
Im sure Lincoln has got Jumble Sale fever today , theres a cat one at Washingborough , Sturton By Stow this afternoon plus a couple of other little ones as well, Mr might let me go to one because we have to go into town today for bits and bobs  . The budget is £2 for this week ..lol

Saturday, 11 March 2017

Pretty Worthless Giveaway

Its Jumble Sale season !!! my favourite time of the year , before the car boot sales start . So I  trotted off to the scout hut in Lincoln last week for a cats sale last week, these are always amazing cheap and so varied it can be a little surreal, I spent a whole £1 on a cushion and 3 articles of clothing , one to cut up for patchwork ,one to unravel for the wool in a virulent lime green and one summer wear in the garden dress that my OH viewed with total horror ...lol...the point is that its these little things that make me happy .
Then it was pop into the Bridge Community Venue and i had to bring these home




Victorian and Edwardian are so unloved these days that this pair of pink and pretty were just pennies , sat among normal everyday dishes , now I cant become a plate collector , I have a drawer full in the filling cabinet already and we havent had a giveaway on this miserable blog forever .
So lets give away a pair of pretty pink romantic transfer ribbon plates , how do you enter may you ask ?  Its so simple, just comment , we will draw a winner by the scientific method of munchkin and dish on Sunday 19th March .
  Doesnt matter where in the world you are , we will post them to you , but it may be buy some weird super cheap postal method , like making Young Baldrick cycle there , so dont expect them tomorrow .

On a plus note theres a scout jumble sale at Lincoln Birchwood scout hut today which I cant make . And a Church Jumble at Tetford  this afternoon , a flyspeck in the Wold that i have had to look up on maps that i want to go to but i need funds...lol  Maybe I should charge them for doing their washing?

Thursday, 9 March 2017

Into The Wilderness

Really havent had time for a lot of me this week , its all Mr Bah Humbug . It would seem that hes actually ill . Its a bit strange really because in the last 2 years of endless locums and never seeing the same person twice , hes been accused of being an alcoholic when he doesnt drink , being a fat dole scrounger in not so many words , struggled to ever get an appointment and become so depressed by it all that he has going on with his body that he has been suicidal .
Now just because his case worker rang them for a medical report hes actually ill . Its a bit obvious that they are in a panic . Hes got endless investigative hospital appointments coming up in the next few weeks , his test results have come back with dreadful scores for all sorts of strange things .
He took great delight in showing them his rotting toe
Why have you never mentioned this before ?

I have mentioned my feet every time ive seen someone for the last 2 years , the last time i was told to shut up because i only had 10 minutes by the locum with no vowels in his name !
Then the was the strange bloke who mumbled a lot and told me he wasnt interested because i was to fat to treat !
The nice arabish lady locum said i needed to see a Neurologist urgently , but you cancelled that because i was already seeing the Pain consultant and Orthopedics and it was to much expense . Oh and then there was Doctor bleedin Google the one who told me there is nothing wrong with me . !!!!!

It would seem because his xrays for his hip has come back clear of anything they now think he may have a problem with his bowels , problem !! hes been getting worse and worse for 2 years !! he has an urgent gastro appointment among all the others .

When he came out from his appointment yesterday, he went to the receptionist to book his next appointment for next week , she turned round and told him no chance and to ring back next week only to find the actual doctor stood there who said he is to get an appointment when he asks for one .
You see it all the time that being fat increases your risk for certain illnesses but it really is a case of getting anyone to look past the fat and actually take you seriously thats a major NHS problem at the moment .

Tuesday, 28 February 2017

Lets Be Positive

Im trying...honest
At the moment i get the feeling that either Donald Trump will decide to invade or I will find an Alien in the airing cupboard!!
Its as if life is an ever depressing soap episode..lol ..one big surreal fantasy .
Last week Mr Bah Humbug tried to book a Doctors appointment 6 weeks post his winter lurgy and snot fest he was coughing and in agony . We got the evil receptionist , who told him to go away and ring back on Monday , which we promptly did .
  We actually got an appointment at the next village surgery rather than the little bungalow in the woods that operates as the mother ship for the practice , we drove up there . It was deserted which was strange just us and one other bloke and a big notice stating theyre shutting all the branch surgeries from this week and you will have to use the mother ship in future , on reading the notice it seems theyre closing them because its to dangerous for a doctor to operate on their own out in the wilderness, who knew its so dangerous out here in bandit country? and they cant fund then anymore We have transport but theres an awful lot of pensioners and the rural poor who dont have anymore . Our bus services are virtually negligable
But to our amazement we actually saw the real practice doctor , not one of the nutty locums or the odd young lad who just taps it in the puter and looks at the answers,  my other half always calls him Dr Google , she actually examined Mr Bah Humbug something none of them have done in the last 2 years it seems he has at least 3 cracked ribs .
Him and the boys have gone off for mission xray today , hes also got to have his pelvis xrayed because he may have broken something in there !!!  She pointed out this is really odd, we know his spine has broken from time to time but this is the sort of injury you get in your 80s so he will have to have some tests done for osteoporosis . It looks as if he has done this just from coughing he says hes not tumbled badly since last year , but he wouldnt admit it if he had . Theres no treatment it should take around 14 weeks to heal, if it heals, we just have to be careful he doesnt get pneumonia till then.
We had quite a long chat with the Doctor as there were no more patients , discussed his re application for ESA which she is more than willing to do the paperwork for .  She said the same thing weve said its allright saying hes fit for work but hes not fit for work unless proper support is provided and its not his fault that the types of things he can do are few and far between , plus the broken bones mean hes not fit at all for the next three months at least . I did point out he had his wrist in plaster during his last ESA medical and they said he was 100% fit , plus they had managed to make him see through an eye that has been blind since he was a child .
So this is todays episode of you couldnt make it up...lol
Dont you think I could write soap scripts with this carry on ?

Sunday, 26 February 2017

Dinosaur

Today I am mostly feeling like a dinosaur ...lol
One of my strange miserable old biddy gripes has to be Lincolnshire Coop , out in the villages beyond Lincoln they are often the only shop for miles , so they have a captive audience really , in the last year they have all undergone or are undergoing a bit of a makeover . They always babble on about being ethical and giving there members the dividend etc etc . They have obviously decided to give up trying to give their customers  a chance of living on a budget , they have become a shop for middle class ready meal eaters and those who can afford to pay through the nose for posh branded items . The quality of what they stock is wonderful but its now so expensive that shopping there is a joke if your on a limited income .  They always used to have a decent stock of basic own brand items which were dearer than other supermarkets but were quite adequate if you added in the cost of travelling  , these are now few and far between, if not you get the gap in the shelves thats always empty for days. You do a good £5.00 family meal deal not much use to pensioners unless they portion it out and eat a bit each day . Plus like a lot of families £5 for a meal is a bleedin luxury I cant afford Today I popped in for bread and bumped into my old neighbour in his 80s wandering round looking lost . As he said they dont stock normal food anymore do they ? He just wanted his basics he cant shop online, hes to frail to travel far , the bus journey to Lincoln wouldnt take him near a supermarket , they are all out of town monoliths .
Yes Lincolnshire Coop , these are your grassroots customers who have supported you for years , it may look pretty in your shop but he doesnt need a hugely expanded wine section , Costa , endless ready meals and a huge cheese selection , yes you have the things he needs but his budget hasnt gone up , just because your prices have rocketed to pay for your revamp.
Oh and while im ranting , have we got blizzards forecast ? Why have you never got cheap bread , just those god awful £1.00 bread buns ?

Friday, 24 February 2017

Feeling Windy

Well yesterday was a bit of a stinker weather wise and guess who had to work..lol it was interesting driving around playing wheelie bin dodgems and crushing recycling tubs , lots of trees down and lorries on their sides in the depths of Lincolnshire , its so flat here that we do seem to get it bad .
So what did i go and do , i managed to fall flat on my face as a gust grabbed me , i was mud from head to toe and im very black and blue and i ache in places ive never ached before , the worse of it was they then decided to cancel my work on health and safety grounds due to the weather ..AAARRRRGGGGHHH
I hobbled home to be greeted by Mr Bah Humbug at his best .
Look on the brightside ! if you were dead I'd be busy chucking your parasitic kids out . You dont know what pain is !!
 His only concern was I'd pinched his coat and it had mud all over it !!!
So I'm sat here feeling very sorry for myself , with the cat offering counselling should be at work ,but Im struggling to bend my knees , i had to take the munchkin to school  in the car this morning the one morning he wanted to walk ..lol then couldnt bend my legs for ages to get out of the car when i got home . I think its a work from home day ...sod it
This is when I really miss having a bath to soak in ..lol
2 Jumble sales in Lincoln tomorrow one at the MS centre and Reepham methodist church , ive 7p in the bank so theres not much chance of me being able to hobble there ..lol

Wednesday, 22 February 2017

Moan & Winge

Oh to have something positive to post...lol ..Ive been working on the theory of if youve got nothing nice to say , say nothing . So I'm very quiet on the blog front .
Work is an unending nightmare , had a row with my boss last week along the lines of
 no im not doing a 100 mile round trip to do a job youre going to pay me £3.00 for sunshine
!!!
But it has the potential to earn you £12

Dont make me laugh ,it will take most of the day and £3 will not cover the fuel .

Your contracted to do this .

As i'm on a zero hours contract , I think you will find that im not .

We can soon find someone else to do it .

Good, find them .

So i'm expecting the sack yet again ..lol

The reason im very militant at the moment  is that my car died , the brakes went going down a big hill into Lincoln , so I then had to do a days work using only the handbrake which was interesting to say the least .
Only to get the whole are you sodding crazy rant , why didnt you ring breakdown !!
Well we havent had breakdown cover for over a year , if i walk out on a days work ,
I have to pay for it and thats well over £500 so what do you suggest sunshine?
Anyway the sons and Mr Bah Humbug in supervisory position on his plastic lawn chair replaced the brakes , then we realised it needed an MOT .
It was booked in and failed miserably with jobs the boys couldnt tackle , so were now totally broke and its a fortnight till pay day , i have my roadworthy vehicle back but no money for fuel to even go to work .
We had our first meeting with our caseworker on Monday , once again we have to round up all the medical reports to try and get some kind of  improvement in our circumstances , we have explained that our doctors are stunningly awful and this could take weeks, but they will provide legal advice and take the whole shitty shambles to an appeal tribunal , she read the huge file i already have and cant quite believe what has happened to Mr Bah Humbug . As she says all they see is his fat belly and they have competely disregarded his life threatening spinal impingement  so we will see where this goes

Tuesday, 14 February 2017

How To Spot The Poor

Heres a few thoughts from the last few days . How to spot the poor for Daily Mail readers .
Lets start with tattoos , they will have loads because the government gives them far to much money and they have lots of time to get them due to the fact that we no longer have Workhouses .
They will be fat , due to the endless takeaways, because theyre too lazy to cook .
They have the latest phone and umpteen other electronica about their person , they should have them confiscated and be fitted with tags so they can be accounted for at all times because theyre all on the fiddle .
As you may have guessed by now , my mother has incorporated all these rants into her latest conversation ...lol
So heres todays challenge , how can you really spot the poor ?
Heres some starters
They will have a crap minimum wage job , maybe two jobs and they will have zero hour contracts so that the economy can flourish !!
 They will hang their washing out all year round in all weathers
They may spend the mornings sat in Weatherspoons or some such chain pub , because its warm, theres free wifi and you can get free refills . Its surprising how you come to love heat once your poor.
 Buggy 'Pushers hogging the shops , for the same reason,its bloody freezing at home and you can kill an hour in Primark where its like the tropics and the store detective gets some exercise following you
Buggy Pushers hanging round each others houses , because you only need to heat one house , and they go to whoever has electric that day , for heat and cooking .
So lets have some more suggestions for how to spot the poor

Tuesday, 31 January 2017

The End

The last day is here , January hurry up and bog off youve not been a great start to the year !!
I have been creating weird and wonderful slow cooker efforts most days , mainly from cupboard leavings . Yesterdays chicken, half a red cabbage ,half a bag of freezer burned stirfry veg ,onions garlic and stock cube piled up with dumplings was a great success, Young Baldrick had 4 bowls and practically cleaned the slow cooker with his tongue , he was just passing through as a grown up had to accompany him to the doctors .
Ive managed to motivate myself to drag out a bit of crocheting I started moons ago, its only a couple of giant mindless granny squares to cover a cushion on my office chair but its a start .
Work for the rest of the week , Friday is payday , so a few grocery necessities and then skint yet again , its no wonder I have the winter blues ..lol
Trying not to watch a lot of TV it just seems to be endless bad news , Trump stamping his foot like a petulant child because he really cant do what he wants without a challenge from somewhere in his own country ,then the truly chilling meeting between him and Mrs May , I think sticking my head in the sand might be a good idea or just doing another quilt ..lol
We didnt try to leave the EU just to become the 53rd state of the USA !! Meanwhile learning Russian still looks like a useful life skill these days ....im turning into a paranoid granny ...AAARRGGGHHH

Thursday, 26 January 2017

Steam

No its not coming out of my ears !!  I just seem to have run out of it completely , January is proving to be a total bore of a month , todays the first day without freezing fog for over a week , instead its arctic wind... I decided to forego walking the school run this morning , I can do without the wind making my head ache all day , short of wearing a mask no amount of Baltic Granny Chic can cure that one , my sinuses get cold and its headache time .  Why is it regarded as child cruelty to make an eight year old walk a mile and a half to school and back , yes our route is bleak and past open fields but I well remember walking 5 miles to school as a kid and thinking nothing of it . Plus i dont care that its dark coming home after school sports , it means i do 6 miles a day to take him but if i can do it 3 times a week it helps stop my back spasms . So on the days i dont have to be somewhere we walk .
The January poverty plan diet has gone really well , i managed to buy 140 chicken thighs for £7 just before xmas bagged them into 6 packs and the slow cooker has been producing chicken varients 3 or 4 times a week , that and deformed fish fingers from Heron have been the staples , plus lots of veg .
We had to go to the diabetes training session last week ,it  seems we eat really healthy , but Mr BH has to face the fact that he isnt known as Mr Two Teas for no reason . lol ,,hes sulking and whining that hes hungry all the time and it is driving me steadily mad . Im not about to start peeling the coating off his fish fingers either . Plus he has never grasped that if he has 3 pieces of fruit a day the rest of us cant afford any fruit at all ...bleedin men
The kids are climbing the walls because he wont allow yogurts crisps or any form of biscuit or cake into the house because he would be tempted , so in one way its quite economical because they eat out more .
The end of month budget is down to pennies but with paying Young Baldricks rent and putting a pair of tyres on my car it is to be expected , work has dried up ,but it usually does till March  so i may now get a few crafty bits sorted .
So roll on February , got to be a bit better hasnt it once the jumble sales start

Wednesday, 18 January 2017

Take A Deep Breath

So Young Baldrick has left the building !!!!! step back and take a deep breath and relax .
Deposited him yesterday in a homeless refuge in Lincoln , it cost me money I had to pay 2 weeks rent up front .
Then I found out the reason his dad wouldnt let him bring his stuff into the house , while  unloading it all at the shelter i find that he has bags of clothes and endless electronics,  game consoles and even an electric guitar and amp , but no household belongings at all . Everything he was given he had thrown in a skip because he wouldnt need it anymore???  If I had known before I paid his wretched rent , I would have marched him down to Cash Converters and made him sell the lot !!!
This shiny new hostel gives them flats with everything in , so the little shite has been playing us yet again , this is where he wanted to live but theyd told he couldnt move here at his last placement  .
As you may have guessed id quite like to ram his Yankee Candle Collection somewhere painful at the moment . The atmosphere is a little frosty at the moment , he even tried to sting his dad for food , when were short after paying his rent !!!
On the strange front , Mr Bah Humbug now has a case worker as well because we had to be assessed as a family due to Young Baldrick , seems very nice, they seem appalled at our financial situation and what we actually manage to live on .  Even more appalled that he wants to work with a potentially life threatening condition , he loves his couple of hours a week at college but it is as much as he can manage . We showed them the paperwork for his ESA medical and the one 3 days previous that he was awarded PIP for and as she said this cant be for the same person .
Theyre going to look into things...I wish them luck .
Work is its usual shambles , theyd like me to go full time to Hull , cant I just move there ? Not quite that simple with a disabled partner who eats more of my time everyday , plus the never ending childcare for my daughter . The Young Baldrick saga that leaps out of the closet everytime everything looks up and then theres my mother ..
Mother dearest went to the doctors with the coughing lurgy doing the rounds . They wanted to admit her to hospital because it turned out to be pleurisy , but there were no beds available so she was sent home with antibiotics and an appointment for the community nurse , they did send her home in an ambulance car however. She didnt plan  to mention any of this but she was grassed up by email from my cousin . So I ring Her
Were you planning on telling me you ill?

No , Im Fine

You sound dreadful so your not fine are you?

Theyre making a fuss over nothing , I went shopping today .

She had gone out for bread and milk on the bus because the weather forecast gave snow and gales !!
So she missed the community nurse , if a neighbour hadnt  come out and told her shed been seen at the bus stop the nurse was going to ring the police for them to break in!!

She is now considerably worse , whinging for england because shes run out of Whisky to ease her cough and wants me to go and nurse her , but ive pointed out I cant do home visits on both sides of the Pennines..AARRRGGHHHHH

Tuesday, 10 January 2017

Saving the NHS ..

I will just drag up me soapbox and then get me ranting head on . Am I the only one who can see that Jeremy Hunt is made of the same mould as Ian Duncan Manslaughter?
This total tit has been buggering up the NHS for quite a while , its now our fault that A & E will crash and burn come the cold spell , our fault for wasting oxygen is it?
Lets start at the beginning , now theyre outsourcing GP practices to various dodgy companies theyre all desperately trying to milk every penny out of central government . All our GPs have that rabbit in the headlights look , they spend endless hours doing medication reviews to see if they can save a shekel by not giving you medication . hundreds of thousands of appointments wasted . So lets stop them for six months , just so GPs can actually diagnose those who actually need to go to a hospital in the winter months. Then theres the endless waste of time prevention courses paid for by the NHS , we are awaiting dietician and how to live with diabetes courses , neither of us have diabetes , but were fat so must be at risk , they have even started Mr on medication , his liver problems caused by medication cause abnormal blood sugar ...Doh .  So you ask cant they change his medication? No,  everything else has been taken off the perscription list by the managing company because its to expensive ....aaarrgghh
A&E , maybe it should change its name to Alcohol and Emergency , surely they can find a filthy cow barn somewhere for the ambulances to open the back doors and just toss the drunks in? But they have to be treated like royalty because of our compensation culture ho hum , in that case breathalyze everyone who turns up to use casualty , £100 charge for treatment at that point if you fail, £200 for drugs  , outsource the fine recovery to private companies and print a list in the local press each week . My mother may die of embarrassment next time she tumbles after her second bottle but i would howl.
Stop blaming the staff Mr Hunt , it getting to the stage where your life would be at risk if you turned up at most hospitals , but lets be honest most of you and your compatriots wouldnt set foot in a NHS hospital except for a photo shoot . Jeremy Corbyn would be the only one of you in casualty !!!
Next big point , the NHS has gone to the dogs because of targets , do away with every last one of them , then a lot of the management could be got rid of , they are there merely to fiddle  figures to get the funding from central government .
Im sure most of us would sit that extra hour in casualty , if someone came out from behind the locked doors and told us they had a major problem , that they couldnt admit anyone because they had run out of beds even in the corridors . In fact most wouldnt be at casualty at all if they could see a GP and not have to talk to the imbecilic phone services that run out of hours medicine .
Its not bloody hard Jeremy !!!
 

Thursday, 5 January 2017

La La La




Well where to begin...lol
Once again im navigating the swamps of the housing department, with the evil one in tow . Had an interesting meeting with them .

So you turned our flat offer down.

Grunt

We will not help you again , heres a list of private landlords . But you will require a deposit and someone as guarantor . We should be able to find temporary accommodation , but it could be anywhere in Lincolnshire .

 Grunt

 Now at this point I totally agree with the lady at the council , why the hell should anyone help him, he turned a flat down , which he forgot to tell us , but i have to grind my teeth and put the case forward .

Are you aware of his disabilities?

Err does he have any ?

They should be listed on his files that you have

She then actually looks through the notes  and admits that she hadnt seen this part of his files and that she was unaware that he should always have an advocate with him and that he is partially sighted so that all documents have to be in large print . So his housing list removal is going to appeal ..

Then another day off work is needed to sort out advocacy for him , I explained what had happened and another charity agreed after a few phone calls to work with him , ive made them very aware about his drug problems and that he will just use them and us then push everyone away , i also found out hes being supposed to be getting daycare psychiatric treatment ..something else he forgot to mention .

So hes still on the sofa , hes eating us out of house and home and creeping round his dad being perfect son .

So for therapy i spent a whole 80p on books i dont need ...lol


Sunday, 1 January 2017

2017 Year Of The Mug



So guess what my New Year Present was? Young Baldrick back on the sofa . Hysterical phone calls last night , to his dad , how hes homeless and being threatened again .
Me and Mr Bah Humbug had our first proper row since weve been together , he pointed out all the hoops weve jumped through for my kids and i pointed out that my pair did the sex and rock and roll and not the drugs . So we went to pick him up from a village near Spalding,  nobody there with a baseball bat that we could see ,he fills the van with all his stuff , then gets a lip on with his dad because he wont let him fetch any of his stuff into the house because hes not staying . He was also searched upon entering .
Cant see any damage , hes just remarkably smug and keeps smiling at me . The cuckoo is back in the nest
As usual he smelt like a ferret and stank of weed , cant see thats hes on the hard stuff at the moment as hes not coming down badly like last time .
Ive made the usual round of phone calls this time, he has an appointment with the homelessness officer first thing Tuesday , I have to be with him because hes classed as vulnerable so thats another day off work . Adult social care cant do a lot because his safeguarding officer isnt in till Tuesday but I had a chat with the duty officer who ive spoken to before and she says they have advised he needs to be in a family environment , not let loose to the world , woopy do !!! in other words they want us to keep him ...no way , I would sooner live in my soddin car than share a house with him and ive made this very clear to Mr Bah Humbug .